Vanderpump Rules
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You would call him a shitheel, but that would be an insult both to heels and to shit.
But these days, there is so much to hate onVanderpump Rules.
Its like trying to drink a mug of almost-cooled cocoa or room-temperature beer.
Who would put these people into their very own slash fiction?
That seems like an invasion.
This week, Dayna and Brett even went to Hyde.
Apparently Charli works there, like shes a prospective fling of Benji Maddens from 2006.
I mean, whats next?
Theyre going to send Danica to Les Deux to shout You know what you did!
There were some moments of fun in this episode, things that reminded me of the old days.
Damn, Scheana, way to get out those claws.
It is so annoying that it washes away the goofy charm we usually get from him.
They decided then, as outcasts, to throw their own pool party at the same time.
Was that a little mean?
But as far as they knew, they didnt have anywhere else to be, so why not party?
There was some ostensible reason, but there really wasnt a reason at all.
There is no petty bigger than that.
That is Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers.
That is a Petty Zoo.
That is Petty Larceny (which should really be Jaxs drag name).
Speaking of women, I want to feel bad for Brittany, but I dont.
But you shouldnt have rage-texted them.
In other words, it was totally his fault, but she cant bring herself to say it.
I get Brittanys predicament.
Because of this split, Sandoval attracts most of the new crew and some old friends to his party.
Stassi is there for an ulterior motive.
She wants to give Jax a talking to.
She might even know him better than Brittany.
She says his recent litany of mean texts makes it look like hes losing his mind.
I am losing my mind, he tells her.
But do you walk on a brain at all?
Does that mean, because his brain is sprained, he cant think?
Does this sprained metaphor have to do with the fact that his brain is sprained?
This is classic Jax.
Then he tries to blame it all on his mental health.
Stassi tells him he can struggle with his mental health and still control his actions.
The problem is that everyone is speaking sense to Jax.
Everyone is telling him hes behaving irrationally and alienating people.
But will any of this work?
Weve seen him in therapy.
Weve seen him in anger management.
Weve seen him doing Reiki with that woman he was in love with.
None of it has worked.
There is no changing him.
There is no improvement, just a lifetime of frustration and chemically induced bad behavior.
I think that is the ultimate problem here.
Come up to my room, it said.
He went upstairs and there was no one in the master.
He heard splashing in the bathroom and tapped the slightly open door so it swung wider.
There he saw Sandoval with one hairy, wet leg hanging over the side of his claw-footed tub.
Why dont you come and shave me?
Sandoval said, taking a disposable razor and dragging it across his forehead before handing it to Schwartz.
Schwartz put one knee down on the wet floor and dragged the razor down Sandovals shin.
Further and further, the hair getting thicker, though soft under the soap water.
