Vanderpump Rules
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This season ofVanderpump Rulesis a little bit like Foosball.
This is, as the Spanish say,basura caliente.
The other funny thing is that it feels both rooted in the past and utterly devoid of it.
This episodes best moment is the remix of Scheana talking about her famous enchiladas.
Brock got it done in about 5.5 minutes.
All of this stuff is inVanderpumps past.
It makes me ache for a show that doesnt exist anymore.
Is that too much to ask?
Can you believe her story line is that she hasnt eaten food?
Thats the plot of the episode.
She cannot think of a First Lady, a boy band, a rapper, or the wordphallic.
Yes, I like Raquel now, and I dont want to call her stupid.
Its part of the job.
Then he tells her that when she first started dating Randall, no one did that to her.
Tom is right about something, however.
Lala says that she never feels like she belongs in the group and that shes always isolated.
Tom tells her, quite accurately, that she brings it on herself.
Lala eventually says shes always trying to prove she belongs in the group.
If Lala keeps feeling that way, its a residual problem of hers, not the groups.
How more central to the show could she be?
Most of the cast arent even original members.
A visit to former Real Househusband of Beverly Hills Paul Nassif confirmed that.
This was more scripted than a high-school production ofArsenic and Old Lace.
Let me get some of that, he says.
Its more erotic than it sounds.
Schwartz cant take it anymore.
He gets up on his knees, undoes his pants, and takes it out of his boxer briefs.
Sandoval props himself on his arm and just stares at it, slack-jawed and drooling.
Dude, is it the mushrooms, Sandoval asks, or is it always this big?
Schwartz slides his palm over Sandovals hair and latches it behind his head before pulling it close.
Does it really matter?
he says with a sly grin that feels like the edges of his mouth could stretch to eternity.
