The Real Housewives of Orange County
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How many conversations have you had about coronavirus?
We went from, Should we wear masks?
to Where should we wear masks?
to Who doesnt wear a mask?
to Oooh, girl, whered you get that mask?
Weve talked about it to death in different ways on different days with different people.
Oh, and she also bought Amazon out of hand sanitizer and Lysol wipes.
That conversation about where all the toilet paper went?
I remember the anxiety of preparedness and wondering how everyone could become so greedy.
I remember thinking it would all pass over in a few weeks or a month tops.
Luckily, we have Braunwyns vow renewal slash super-spreader event to distract us from all of that.
The big surprise is that apparently everyone in Braunwyns family is hot.
Young Sean, hot.
Braunwyns stepdad Brian, hot.
Braunwyns half-brother Marley, hot.
I am now wanting to watch the movieMarley and Meand it has nothing to do with dogs.
Of course you do.
Elephants, Bravo fans, and the internet.
These are things that never forget.
Its ironic, dont you think?
As the other women point out, she is not at all sympathetic to what Braunwyn is going through.
You cant take one day off?
If you cant, know what that makes you?
The fly in the chardonnay, thats what.
I mean, arent they going to have all the other alcohols there?
Cant they switch to vodka sodas foroneparty?
They must be good.
17 billion gays cant be wrong.
This is a bottle of tequila that Im not supposed to tell you about, Kelly says.
Shannon thinks shes so much better because she was subtle about it, but I think thats actually worse.
Kelly Dodd cant help but Kelly Dodd and isnt going to hide it.
Shannon pretends to be your friend when shes really plotting against you behind your back.
This is why Kelly thinks that Shannon is making a competing water as her new product.
I dont know, the marketing isnt that clear.
She says its like a lemon cleanse, kind of like theMaster Cleanse, I guess.
But what do you need Shannons tincture for?
And do you put it in water?
Is it like a water flavoring?
She starts ranting to her boyfriend about the audacity Kelly has to accuse her of launching a competing product.
Oh god, Shannon.
I mean, I get it.
At this point, Im going to start calling Ginas condo Lucy Lucy Apple Duplex.
As for the vow renewal itself, it sure is something.
When she starts the ceremony, she talks about how everyone isnt drunk enough.
She is the rain and this is the wedding day.
Currens got kind of a chubby little face and these enormous black-rimmed glasses.
All he needs is a cigar and a table at Chasens and he could be running MGM.
Curren is now my favorite and has replaced Jacob, the drag queen son from last episode.
Everyone kind of laughs awkwardly, but its not funny.
Either way, this is why you dont give 14-year-olds a platform at these things.
Then Braunwyn gives Sean his gift: its an immunity idol.
That is what Emily calls his ridiculous statement necklaces and this is the immunitiest of all the idols.
This is the Moderna vaccine of idols.
Braunwyn tells us that it is two fishing hooks because that is a symbol of being a provider.
But theyre not normal sized.
