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These are dark days for Bachelor Nation.
WhatLTYHlacks in production value and anysemblance of logic, it makes up for in questionable sartorial choices.
Specifically, the endless array of accessories dripping off every male contestant.
Im not buying it.
Being hot is just not enough here.
Danny
Are teeth an accessory?
What does it open?
But its definitely not any kind of emotional vault.
(Hes a sentient desert boot, remember?)
It may even be a bit of a cop-out.
This is a contest of personal brands and Jacks is confusing.
It doesnt help that my dude got in zero on-camera words before hitting the bricks.
Gabe
A decent showing, but Im left wanting more from Gabe.
Brandon is a piece of work, but he doesnt completely fail when it comes to accessories.
Its just too much!
There are spoon rings, prayer bracelets, beaded necklaces, and signets all happening at the same time.
We have no idea who this guy actually is.
I empathize with the awkward visible ankle situation, but mens pants come in varied inseams!
No, thank you.
My biases are nothing if not predictable.
Russell
Now this is what I call a personal brand.
Is it a good one?
Solid work, my man.
Sheridan
I know, I know.
This is the obvious choice.
But it turns out this show does indeed abide by Occams razor.
Who cares if he didnt actually win the prize and got booted before making it to the semifinals?
Sheridan is the only contestant that matters in the accessories gauntlet.
Or at least milk a fewSpotify streamsfrom his final, fleeting moments of Bachelor Nation fame.
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