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You graduated from Catholic University with a masters in acting.
I was ready to almost quit and go home, like,I cant do this.
Im such a loser actress.
This ain’t running.
I would have actors come in, and there was this one actor friend.
This was when improv was huge in the late 80s.
I auditioned and got it, so every Saturday night, I got paid $10.
The guy who ran it told me to do a one-person show.
We made flyers that said it was Off Broadway and gave them out at TKTS.
But I rented out the lobby of Westside Arts Theatre at 43rd.
It was $9.99.
Seinfeld came to that, so thats how I got cast.
Your first big TV break wasThe Golden Girls.
You hear stories of Betty White and Bea Arthur butting heads on set.
I was like,Oh my God, theres tension!
Can you take me through yourSNLaudition?Jan Hooks and Nora Dunn had both just left.
There were about ten of us auditioning.
I had taken all these characters that I had and put it into three minutes.
So I made it almost like a demo reel, like you would do now.
But I had the one-woman show, so I knew what I was doing.
Basically, we had to go into 8H, and the whole cast was there as the audience.
Afterward, we all stayed at the Paramount Hotel.
I think I found out that night, but I couldnt wake my parents up.
I didnt do much on the show.
I was inthe sorority-girl sketch, and I did Katharine Hepburn.
I played the judge a lot.
Which was a huge thing.
Stand-ups are a totally different breed.
I get onSaturday Night Live, my lifelong dream, and they are cutthroat because they have to be.
I realized that within a week of being on the show.
Its the one thing thats more cutthroat than being an actress.
How did that work?Before I got onSNL, I didSeinfeld.
It was a boxing-match plot, Mike Tyson maybe.
How did Delta Delta Delta come together?
Its a rare example of a female ensemble during the Bad Boy era.That was Melanie Hutsell, her idea.
I would help write them since we got to do a couple.
It was always like, Now whats the girls sketch going to be?
So we were lucky, but the pressure was huge.
Because it was, like,onesketch!
It was not, like, Oh, sketch No.
2 went well, or, No.
4 went well no, you had one chance.
But did that color your experience at all?I mean, I loved it.
I was very good friends with Chris Farley.
We were the young people.
There were two groups at the time, and it was understood that you have to earn your chops.
Which is how it should be!
It wasnt sour grapes if I was only in one sketch.
I was completely appreciative of the whole experience.
I was much more comfortable on a film set with a role.
To me its much easier to learn a part and you know that part.
You have a couple chances to take and retake, as opposed to live sketch comedy.
I was roommates with Ellen Cleghorne.
Shes in my new film,Rushed, actually.
But Michael Jordan, I think, was the first show of the year.
And he was great so nervous.
I didnt know anything, and of course my family was like, My God, youre withMichael Jordan!
I said before the sketch, I want to tell you something.
Youre really nervous, arent you?
He was like, Yeah.
Okay, I wrote down a piece of advice on this paper.
I want you to look at it the second before you go onstage.
I was a waitress inDa Bearswith him.
I said, Open this right before you go onstage and it will help you.
So I wrote: Dont F this up.
He comes onstage, shocked.
I get this call from [casting director] Avy Kaufman this is my first introduction with her.
I had to play a prison guard [inDancer in the Dark] and cry.
And in the United States, Im pegged as being comedic.
Im trying to break out of it.
[Lars] didnt know this, and thank God Avy is brilliant and has an open mind.
Most casting people wouldve never called me in for a serious part.
So I have to be this prison guard and cry, which I didnt think I could do.
I dont know why, but I will definitely be going back.
How was it working with a screen legend like Lauren Bacall inDogville?9/11 had happened.
We started filming in Sweden in January.
Lars von Trier only shoots eight hours a day, its so totally civilized.
Youre finished at 5 or 6 each night, and you’re able to leave on the weekends.
So I had tiny babies, and Im in first class, as is Lauren Bacall.
Im dripping with children.
We became really good friends.
I didnt think youd be friends with me either!
Then we lived close to each other in New York City.
Wed go out to dinner.
Her apartment was like a museum.
There are a few clinkers on my resume.
1:Do I want to do this?And No.
2:I have three kids.
But trust me, I had no business turning a lot of things down.
They politely said, Were going a different way with our clients.
I knew it was because I had a lot of nerve.
I just went with my gut on what Im comfortable with.
One time, I left a show I had a recurring role on.
But I had to go back in because I still had to do the part.
It was just getting too raunchy for me, I couldnt take it.
I had makeup people saying, So glad you said no.
The producers had to have a talk with me, which is so funny.
I said, Look, I have a 12-year-old daughter.
This is just going against my grain.
This is just how I operate.
The beauty is, honestly, Ive never had any fights with people over it.
And now Im so old its become this quirky thing: Shes kind of odd.
She doesnt take parts.
Something likeDogvilleis pretty provocative.
So how do you decide thats okay?I agree, but its also a human story.
And I loved my part, in the church.
As opposed to something thats egregious just to be raunchy.
Thats why now, with writing my own movies, its just better to have more control.
I like film better, because with TV you have no control.
Its like they hire you, then if they take a U-turn with your character, youre screwed.
Lets just say it wasnt in my comfort zone.
They wanted me to do it and I said no.
They called me in the middle of the night and said Id gotten cast in it.
I said, Okay, that would be no.
They said, What do you mean?
And I said, Because my father will kill me!
It was a bit like dating when you say no: They want you.
They called back: Are you sure?
Its going to be great.
I said, Listen, you dont know my father.
I always tried to keep my kids in mind, and my parents.
And, by the way, in a background part in this thing that goes against my grain.
I just said no and that was it.
I think people respect that.
Im notwhinyabout it, like, Oh, youre being terrible to women.
No, look, this isnt me.
Thats just not my humor, and Im not going to be a part of it.
But I would never take some political stand.
I was like,Im a part of history, and this is how it is right now.
I always appreciate everything that came out of there for me.
