Vampire Veek
Neck hey!
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Either the wordsvampire au ao3mean nothing to you or you are sick in the head.
Search vampire au ao3, and you get tens of thousands of what if?
scenarios about beloved fictional characters and real-life boy-band members struck with vampirism.
These can be impossibly cringe (My Immortal) or really quite good.
After all, what isOnly Lovers Left Aliveif not a Jim Jarmusch AU of his own body of work?
Many, if not most, TV shows would be improved if they were about vampires instead of people.
In honor ofVampire Week at Vulture, here are but some of those shows.
The ruthlessness is there.
Logans grooming Kendall to be a killer and Kendalls struggles with addiction fit all too snuggly into this setup.
Is Greg a new vampire?
Does Roman have an inverted setup in whichhis familiar Gerri is his domme?
Does Tom slowly realize what he married into?
Frasier
Frasier and Niles are already skulking creatures of the night.
Well iron that part out.
Imagine vampire Niless love for the innocent mortal Daphne Moon under these impossible circumstances.
Imagine Frasier and Niles wearing 100 percent more capes.
Scandal
The feats Olivia Pope accomplish are basically only possible if shes a vampire.
She subsists on red wine (blood) and has been known to don a cape.
Her dynamic with Fitz would be so much hotter.
Kerry Washington is already the worlds best mouth actor; lets get some fangs in there.
Hannibal
Self-explanatory.
Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Hear me out.
Charlie is somewhat feral and subterranean and half-rat, a self-professed nightcrawler.
Rickety Cricket is their Renfield.
Plenty of opportunities for new, fun schemes.
This is how we keep the show going for fifteen more seasons.
Greys Anatomy
Vampires and hospitals go together like health insurance and fuckery.
What if Izzy Stevens turned Denny Duquette before his heart gave out?
We would have been spared the ghost-sex plotline.
Instead wed have a far bettervampire-sex plotline.
(Addison would obviously be the vampire queen dont get me started.)
Just imagine how high the stakes would be when they lure unsuspecting men into their vacation homes.
But ifBridgertonwas about vampires boning in the 19th century, I would be its biggest fan.
Girls
Jessa turns Shosh and doesnt see how that was a total overstep.
Literally nothing else about the show changes.
