Friday Night Movie Club
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The return of the holiday season means that, yes, itsHome Alonetime yet again.
Specifically, the McCallister family.
By virtue of this movies premise, were not meant to spend very much time with Kevins massive family.
During this whirlwind sequence, were introduced to the McCallister kids.
And thats correct: It has come time to judge the McCallister kids ofHome Alonebased on arbitrary subjective criteria.
But to that I say: This is what we do with our holiday classics.
We break them down and reassemble them like toys on Christmas morning.
Others take to pointing out that one cameo that hasnt aged so well.
Me, Im ranking children.
Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals.
Do they live here?
), but thats pretty much all the movie gives her.
Tracy (Senta Moses)
Compared with Rod, Tracy doesnt actually get a ton of material.
Her only real character beat is to complain that she cant find any shampoo in the house.
Truthfully, I wanted more.
Yes, her What am I supposed to do?
Shake his hand and say Congratulations, youre an idiot?
Megans the mean older sis you want on your side.
Megan gets it done.
But he also has a lot to make up for.
Fullers name is pretty much spoken like an ancient Romanian curse in the McCallister house.
You know what will happen.
The truth is, of all the McCallister children, Fuller wields the most power.
Buzz (Devin Ratray)
This fuckin guy.
Buzz is so mean to Kevin!
Okay, Kevins acting like a brat, but that sure seems like learned behavior to me.
And yet … from a story perspective, Buzz is necessary.
Far more so than his siblings and cousins.
And you know what, Buzz?
Itispretty cool that Kevin doesnt burn the place down.
Linnie (Angela Goethals)
An absolute legend.
Kevins blonde, braces-faced older sister is the subtle knife of the McCallister family.
After all, Youre what the French callles incompetents.
The library, as they say, is OPEN!
Kevin (Macaulay Culkin)
Its predictable, but … hes Kevin!
He defends his home from the notorious Wet Bandits!
He helps to reunite a disgraced old man with his granddaughter!
He got the milk, eggs, and fabric softener!
Oops, I brought up the sequel.
Heather (Kristin Minter)
The oldest McCallister cousin, Heather just absolutely shines in her limited screen time.
Meet me on Vultures Twitter at 7 p.m. this Friday.
