Dash & Lily
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Maybe it is the most detestable time of the year.
The only present to be found is the serial-killer book Langston got for their dad.
Thats an excellent dad gift, but it does not help Lilys overall demeanor.
Lilys disappointed, but shes not giving up yet.
She runs over to Aunt Lillians to see if perhaps she has the notebook.
Aunt Lillian is a pro.
Still, Lily cant shake it.
She starts going over the sentence in her head.
His name is Dash.
And then it hits her again: She just met a Dash last night.
It must be him.
Lily needs some confirmation of her theory, so she calls up the only source she has: Boomer.
How does she get Boomers cell number, you ask?
Im still laughing at the specificity of her plan.
Unfortunately, Boomer does confirm what she was worried about: Dash was at that party.
He did leave with his ex Sofia.
Whats a brokenhearted girl to do on Christmas Day but get drunk on peppermint schnapps with her caroling group?
Uh, that peppermint schnapps hits Lily real hard, real fast.
Lilys learning so fast!
Okay, its more like mcsorleysss.
Thats romance, baby!
And then we rewind.
We head back to Christmas Eve, this time to follow Dashs story.
Now, however, we see that Dash stops the whole thing before it goes too far.
Im kissing you, but thinking about her, he tells Sofia.
The exes get honest with each other: Neither one really wants to start this up again.
Its all very amicable!
They do, however, decide to spend the night at the Morgan Library, just for kicks.
Sofia tells her now-friend that Lily deserves more than a notebook at Christmas.
Someone on the app spotted the red boot at McSorleys.
Dash cant believe it!
Everythings working out perfectly!
This must be what Christmas magic is!
He runs to McSorleys, making a pit stop at the movie theater to buy two tickets toCollation.
The kid even hugs Santa Claus!
he shouts into the streets of New York.
Dash has been filled with the Christmas spirit and love and nothing can stop him now!
It is the worst-nightmare version of what Dash and Lilys first meeting could be.
Hes trying to process what hes seeing and getting very judgy, might I add.
Shes too drunk to process anything.
The cab ride there is excruciating.
She also lets it slip that she met Boomer, which really upsets Dash.
Dash writes one last letter to Lily in the notebook before handing her over to Aunt Lillian.
Wow, wow, wow, are these two the saddest little lovebirds.
Lily proceeds to barf into her red boot.
The evening does not get better from there.
Lily has the only acceptable response to that news and screams loudly into a pillow.
Lets make things worse, shall we?
She picks up her notebook and finds Dashs last letter.
It begins with we set ourselves up for this disappointment and gets worse from there.
Its better if we both move on, he writes.
He says good-bye and then wishes her a Merry Christmas.
Now is the time youre allowed to listen to Joni Mitchells River.
Its Christmas and we are all devastated.
This is actually a great lesson to learn at 17, it will come in handy!
Dash: Collationis sad?
Movie Theater Guy: Tears of joy.
Just let me see this movie!
Merry Christmas, you beautiful, angry New Yorker!
